Last week I sent a note in our weekly email about the need to pull the reigns back on sexy Halloween costumes. My intention was to call attention to the fact that there seems to be no options for girls and women who don’t want to dress sexy. Immediately after I hit send on that email I got some responses on Twitter and via email from members in our community that felt I was slut shaming.
It never occurred to me that my words could be perceived as slut shaming but that’s how they came across. I quickly edited the blog post to be more explicit but it was too late for the email. Though it wasn’t my intention, I am sorry that I wasn’t more articulate in expressing my frustrations about the pressures to constantly be viewed through a sexualized lens.
While it never feels good to be called out when you make a mistake the response and the way it was delivered – through a willingness to engage in dialogue rather than a rush to judgement – made me realize that what we’ve built here is true community.
I recently gave a talk at a conference where I discussed the nature of the HelloFlo’s community. Here’s how I described it.:
“This isn’t kumbaya hold your hands community. But speak the truth and hold you up community. Solve problems community. Raise our voices community. Disagree respectfully community.”
My mistake last week taught me that I was 100% spot on about what this community is really about. Thank you for being part of it.