“The way you show up in bed is how you show up in life.” So what does that mean for your bank account?
It’s a proven statistic: People who have more sex also have more money. According to the Institute for the Study of Labor, people who have sex four times a week (or more) generally earn more moolah than colleagues who aren’t getting it on as often. This direct correlation is great news for people who have a lot of sex, but for those who are struggling financially, it’s rather disappointing. Not only does it mean bank accounts are suffering but it’s also indicative of sexual appetites taking a hit, too.
Kim Anami is a holistic sex and relationship coach and the author of a blog about vaginal weight-lifting. With a bold proclamation on her blog – “the easiest way to get rich is to have more sex!” – she knows a thing or two about the relationship between sex and finances.
“Sexual energy is creative energy — it’s the energy that creates new life. If you aren’t making babies with that energy, you can channel this energy out into your life and career,” Anami tells HelloFlo. “There is a strong correlation between sexual expression and financial wealth. The more people get in tune with and comfortable with their sexual energy, the more money they make.”
So what exactly is the strong correlation between a savings account and what goes on in the bedroom? It might be as simple as vulnerability and a strong communication skill set.
In fact, SunTrust Bank reported in 2015 that finances are the leading cause of stress in relationships and marriages, with 35% of people surveyed citing money as “the primary cause of friction.”
And you can bet that if you’re fighting with your significant other about cash flow, you’re probably not engaging in much of a lucrative sex life.
Much like money, sex can be a difficult topic of discussion. It’s fraught with frustration and the bottom line is if you have trouble communicating effectively with your partner, especially about the difficult stuff, you will see these issues arise time and time again throughout different topics. Because money and sex are two of the most difficult subjects – and additionally, taboo subjects – to talk about with your partner, it’s completely understandable why friction in one of these areas could lead to friction in the other.
“I have seen this over and over again,”Anami continues. “One of my biggest pieces of coaching advice for people feeling financially stuck is to have more sex, and/or masturbate more often.”
What can be done to alleviate the strain of discussing hard topics? According to Kim Anami, start by normalizing the hard stuff.
“We live in a global culture that [stifles] sex,” she tells HelloFlo. “We’ve all internalized this oppression to some degree. Yet, we are innately all sexual beings with vibrant sexual appetites. Part of the healing and reclaiming around sex is simply being able to talk about it – with friends, partners, children, at dinner parties.”
Similarly, Anami’s research lends itself to another potential resolution. If the effort is going to be put into normalizing talking about sex, perhaps the same effort can also be funneled into normalizing the money talk, too.
“Everyone is secretly dying to talk about sex,” she continues. “Once you start the conversation, people spill over because they’ve been bottled up for so long. Same thing applies with money—with anything really. Any part of your life you hide or have shame about has power over you and limits you. So confront these things head on and then your demons evaporate.”
And along with the demons, the exertion and stress becomes easier and ultimately, disappears, too.
Once a couple learns how to resolve communication issues – both in their sex lives and finances – there are so many benefits to be experienced and to look forward to.
“I have worked with couples who were struggling financially,”Anami says. “They were also stagnant in their relationships. Each time we’d resolve any issue between them emotionally, or heal an old wound, the cash would pour in. I began to see this happen so regularly, that I now cite it as a fact in relationship dynamics: sexual blocks create financial blocks. Clearing these blocks [will lead to] increased cash flow.”
Anami also maintains that confidence is a huge factor in both sexual and financial issues. When a couple addresses their complications – no matter what they’re concerning – with vulnerability, honesty, and of course, confidence, that couple can expect an abundance of energy, which can manifest itself as cash, a sexual awakening, and in many other positive ways.
“The way you show up in bed is the way you show up in life,”Anami offers. “As you get bolder in the bedroom, asking for what you want, fulfilling your pleasure, exploring the different facets of your erotic nature, you also become more confident in your daily life. It starts to happen naturally, without even having to ‘try’ to be confident.”
So what steps can women take to start working toward better sexual and financial health? Get to love-making! No, seriously. Whether you’re performing solo or becoming more sexually confident with your partner, Kim Anami says both types of sexual renaissance can lead to more money.
“Have more sex. Clear up any unexpressed and unresolved emotional baggage between you. Get to know yourself as a sexual being,”Anami advises. “Consciously commit to a journey of sexual self-discovery.”
Lastly, start looking at your sexuality as the force it truly is. Once you take control of your sex life and learn how to harness the power of your sexual energy, the financial and sexual possibilities are absolutely endless.
“Your sexual energy is your power source,”Anami says. “Once you realize this, your whole life will change. Miraculously and for the better.”
For more resources on how both men and woman can explore their sexual selves and up-level intimacy, check out Kim Anami’s YouTube channel!