The brilliance of the prostate is definitely underutilized — massaging, stroking, and rubbing the P-Spot can unlock a wide area of experimentation and exploration for you and your partner. All of our sex organs are made up of the same tissue which means that, generally speaking, we can all navigate each other’s bodies with a sense of familiarity, whether you’re biologically one sex or another.

This is why pegging can be a very welcomed addition to your sex life.

Now, to begin, what exactly is pegging?

Pegging is when one partner wears a strap-on harness and dildo to penetrate her partner for anal play. Pegging can also be defined by some as an act that occurs strictly between a cis-woman and a cis-man. The term itself was given to the act thanks to a poll conducted by Dan Savage in 2001.

Pegging has oftentimes been stereotyped as a homosexual act, or something that makes a cis-men something less than authentically heterosexual. The stereotypes surrounding pegging mean that a partner, or a couple, could see submission, penetration and loss of masculinity as anxiety-triggering experiences.

Make sure that when you’re introducing pegging (or any new sex act) that comfort, communication and trust are all a part of the equation. Here are a few tips to help you and your partner ease into the act.

Finding the goods

First, you need to purchase the strap on and the equipment that is needed. A nice harness with a silicone dildo is recommended. Harnesses will depend on your preference. There are g-string styles and two strap styles. The dildos come in all shapes and colors, so all of your options can be met for you and your partner. Lubricant is a must, just like with any anal play.

Discussing domination and submission

The power dynamics in the bedroom are definitely something that should be properly explored between heterosexual couples. The reversal of giving and taking can be exhilarating. By discussing domination with your partner, and what you’re going to get out of it, you can both decide what you’re going to receive from the new sexual act together.

What is my partner going to get out of it?

As we said above, men have P-Spots, which is just a G-Spot (or an A-Spot). The P-Spot is an area inside of the rectum which stimulates the prostate gland. Additionally, the psychological enjoyment of being submissive, is another way a partner can be excited.

Okay, now what?

First you massage, then you penetrate. Anal play can be a fun and enjoyable experience if communication and proper steps are taken to achieve an orgasmic state. Massaging with fingers is how anal play should begin, never jump right into penetration. Doggy style, face to face, and spooning, are all great positions to try out once strapping on your harness. Pegging takes practice and becoming comfortable with your harness and dildo can take a few tries — don’t give up!

If you’re interested in the dynamics, but aren’t sure how your partner will react, simply talk about it. Pegging isn’t something that you can spontaneously do in the bedroom — it’s a moment that you need to discuss with whoever you are sexually seeing.

IMAGE COURTESY OF GETTYIMAGES

By S. Nicole Lane on March 27, 2017
Nicole is a women's health journalist living in Chicago. Her sex and art column, "Intimate Justice" can be found on Sixty Inches from Center. She also contributes to The Establishment, HelloGiggles, GO Magazine, and elsewhere. In addition to writing she is an artist who works with assemblage and sculpture. She tweets at @snicolelane.